Up • Love, Authority, Discipline • The Tree Must Bend

What is the difference between Love and Authority? When I was growing up in the 50s and 60s parents had shown authority to their children.   They also had much Love for them as well.  And I must say, with all that Love and Authority we had, we turned out okay..  None of us had any dealings with drugs nor the police. Today of course it's a different ball game,  parenting with authority went out the door and only love was to be given to the child.   Little do these parents know that without authority their is very little the child cannot do and thus we setting the child up for failure. More on this later on. You see, as new children coming into the world we are born with the "everything is mine"  attitude.  Take a toddler and put him on the floor in the doctors office.  Give him a toy and he'll be happy for a little while.   Introduce another toddler the mix and you'll notice in no time that both toddlers  will both be fighting for the same toy. Children aren't born with the "know how"  to share things.  This trait must be thought to them.  Learning to deal with others, to share, to accept losing, are all traits of character to be develop in our children.  Oh you'll find that some kids get it much other than other kids. But many parents are not ready to assert authority.  Some think that doing so is not loving the child.  They think that we should never try to discipline a child because they are too young to understand.  Perhaps its true for their kinds but it worked for me. Once my little girl started to walk she was all over my home stereo equipment.  Turning knobs, making the music loud, then going into a panic because she didn't know how to turn it back down.   Well, it only took a couple of small slaps to her hand coupled with a voice of authority saying "NO" and that's it.   She would play all day in the living room and I never had to worry.  I remember laughing one day when I heard my friend talking about how he had to take his VCR in for repair because his kid stuck a tuna sandwich into it. As you can see, you can show authority and teach your child from a very young age and yet, do it with Love.  Never discipline a child when you  are in a rage or in anger.   Being angry certainly will be one of my topics here.   Don't ever let a teaching experience become so out of control that it becomes a case of child abuse. --------------------------------------------------------------------------